IllVee invited us to our first rock concert. We didn't expect so much blood.
The opening act was much different. There was less blood.
This is the true story of seven penguins, picked to live in a house and have their lives blogged.
Find out what happens when penguins stop being polite and start getting real...
Tuesday, January 15, 2019
Tuesday, January 1, 2019
New Year's Eve
Last night IllVee gave Milty some "special medicine," but he started feeling weird so he drank more "special medicine," then he felt sick so he drank more "special medicine," then he told us all that he's made mistakes in his life but he loves us all and he maybe he needs to make changes and we're the greatest and where are his clothes, and then he fell asleep. Modern medicine is amazing.
Wednesday, October 31, 2018
Halloween
Each year we take turns choosing our costume.
Milty says when penguins die they turn into ghosts, so we all dressed up like ghosts for halloween this year.
Mormy says when a penguin dies their body decomposes, their being ceases to exist, and soon all memory of them will be forgotten. That costume will be much more difficult next year.
Monday, October 1, 2018
Morning Mamu
Sometime I like to run home from the club. It's good exercise and I can usually do it in less than 24 hours. Sometimes a guy in a van offers to give me a ride. Today I listened to Flight of the Concords on my phone. They're the greatest!
Thursday, August 9, 2018
A Friend In Need
A special blog reader is going through some tough times.
When I'm feeling down, I like to sing loudly, "LALALALALALALALA!"
Sunday, May 13, 2018
Mother's Day
On the shelf behind us is a special photo of a group of our mothers sitting at a table.
El dia de la madre!
El dia de la madre!
Wednesday, April 25, 2018
World Penguin Day
If I had one wish that I could wish this World Penguin Day it would be for all the penguins of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.
If I had two wishes that I could wish for this World Penguin Day, the first would be for all the penguins of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace.. and the second would be for $30 million a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account.
You know, if I had three wishes that I could make this World Penguin Day, first, of course, would be for all the penguins to get together and sing.. the second would be for the $30 million every month to me.. and the third would be for all encompassing power over every living being thing in the entire universe.
And if I had four wishes that I could make this World Penguin Day, first would be the crap about the penguins.. second would be for the $30 million.. the third would be for all the power.. and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year for an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought about slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina somebody, I can't think of her name, of course my lovely wife could come, too. She's behind me 100% on this, I guarantee you.
Wait a minute, maybe that sex thing should be the first wish! So, if I made that the first wish, because, you know, it could all go boom tomorrow, and then what have you got? No, no.. the penguins singing would be great, that would be nice. No, no, who am I kidding! I mean, they're not gonna be able to get all those penguins together! I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible! It's more trouble than it's worth! So, we reorganize: here we go. First, the sex - we go with that; second, the money. No! We go with the power second, then the money, and then the penguins. Oh, wait, oh geez! I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay.. revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in Hell! That would be the fourth wish! And of course, my fifth wish would be for all the penguins of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of peace and harmony. Thank you, everybody.
If I had two wishes that I could wish for this World Penguin Day, the first would be for all the penguins of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace.. and the second would be for $30 million a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account.
You know, if I had three wishes that I could make this World Penguin Day, first, of course, would be for all the penguins to get together and sing.. the second would be for the $30 million every month to me.. and the third would be for all encompassing power over every living being thing in the entire universe.
And if I had four wishes that I could make this World Penguin Day, first would be the crap about the penguins.. second would be for the $30 million.. the third would be for all the power.. and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year for an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought about slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina somebody, I can't think of her name, of course my lovely wife could come, too. She's behind me 100% on this, I guarantee you.
Wait a minute, maybe that sex thing should be the first wish! So, if I made that the first wish, because, you know, it could all go boom tomorrow, and then what have you got? No, no.. the penguins singing would be great, that would be nice. No, no, who am I kidding! I mean, they're not gonna be able to get all those penguins together! I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible! It's more trouble than it's worth! So, we reorganize: here we go. First, the sex - we go with that; second, the money. No! We go with the power second, then the money, and then the penguins. Oh, wait, oh geez! I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay.. revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in Hell! That would be the fourth wish! And of course, my fifth wish would be for all the penguins of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of peace and harmony. Thank you, everybody.
Thursday, April 12, 2018
Milty's Birthday
For his birthday, Milty did not go to West Virginia. But one time Hugsy visited West Virginia and he rode a train.
Thursday, March 29, 2018
Yoga
Milty and I like to do yoga everyday. A lot of times Hugsy watches us do yoga and wishes he could do yoga but he doesn't understand yoga.
Tuesday, March 6, 2018
Ho
Ho ho ho ho ho. Ho ho ho. Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho? Ho ho. Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho. Ho ho ho ho ho ho. Ho ho ho ho!
This is the spell IllVee used to switch my personality with new Milty.
Wednesday, February 21, 2018
Hat Day
Today is that girl's birthday. On birthdays we like to wear hats. Sometimes for a party and sometimes because it's cold. That's why it's called "hat day." Happy Hat Day!
Wednesday, February 14, 2018
Valentine's Day
Valentine's Day is a holiday like Halloween. Last year for Halloween we were Mexico.
Thursday, April 20, 2017
Milty's Birthday
For his birthday, Milty got cake AND fish. Penguins LOVE to eat fish. One time Milty drew a picture of a fish and MelVee ate it. Milty cried because he wanted to eat it. But penguins shouldn't eat paper fish. It makes our poop white and sometimes even bloody.
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